THE MALEBOX REVIEWS :: THE MECHANIC by ALEXA RILEY

17 September, 2016

‘I can’t wait to get my hands on her….’

Our Male Reviewer dived into a little (or a lot!) of smut!

SYNOPSIS

Everything was fine until that innocent little rich girl walked into my garage. Since the second I laid my eyes on her, all I’ve wanted to do is get my dirty hands on her pure body.

There’s one minor obstacle standing in my way, but I’ve got a plan. All I’ve got to do is claim her, and she’ll be mine forever.

Warning: This book is over-the-top, insta-love. There’s nothing but steamy scenes, babies trying to be made, and an obsessed bearded alpha hero claiming a virgin who will be his forever. If you want it hot and dirty, this is it!

Available to purchase below:

Reviewed by The Malebox

Author Warning: “This book is over-the-top, insta-love. There’s nothing but steamy scenes, babies trying to be made, and an obsessed bearded alpha hero claiming a virgin who will be his forever. If you want it hot and dirty, this is it!”

You really are a lucky bunch, you have another review from The Malebox. This time it is The Mechanic by Alexa Riley. I’m not sure what has come over me, unlike Penelope it wasn’t Paine, but for what it’s worth you get double the loving from MB this month. As usual, I don’t know anything about the author or the book. This time I was sent a number of books by TB and I was allowed to chose my own. It was a big responsibility bestowed upon me, and one which after this review, they will probably not give to me again.

So what is The Mechanic…let me describe it through the magic of song. “uptown girl, she’s been living in her uptown world, I bet she’s never had a backstreet guy, who takes her virgin c**t , kinda grooms her and wants to breeds her…this girl is filthy but she’s really shy, he’s gonna try, Woah oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh”

The setting of the book really does remind me of the classic Billy Joel 80’s video Uptown Girl, and I found myself humming it throughout my read. I am a lover of anything that reminds me of the 80’s, so this was a winner from the word go.

Paine (aka billy Joel) works as a dirty mechanic, and one day in walks high class Penelope (aka Christie Brinkley) for a car repair. I think the author maybe could’ve got Paine and Penelope to do a little bit of choreographed dancing when they first met, as I think it could’ve added a softer side to both characters. It would have said ‘hey, we have issues just like everyone else, but let’s dance it out.’ Maybe even Joey and Butch, the other employees at the garage could’ve joined in. I would draw the line at Penelope’s brother the cop though, as we would have run the risk of turning it into a karaoke Village People performance.

Anyway, from the moment Paine sees Penelope strut her stuff into the garage, he falls in love with her. Much like I did when I first saw Christie Brinkley waltz into Billy’s workshop.

After this chance meeting, Penelope pays for the car maintenance, by showing him her panties and letting Paine touch her up. This is clearly where I have been going wrong with my car servicing plan as I always seem to pay an extortionate amount of money for them just to look at it. Who knew that all I had to do was let my my mechanic cop a feel and keep my underwear, so that he could sniff it later. I could have saved thousands.

Unfortunately, even after this brief sexual assault in the dirty workshop, Paine does not know anything about Penelope, not even her name. So he does what any reasonable man would do under the circumstances…He starts stalking her and telling everyone in town who wants to listen that she is his and that he has marked his pussy territory.

Depending on which way you view this behaviour, it is either romantic or creepy. Does he love her or does he want to keep her eyes in a Ragu jar on his nightstand whilst the rest of her is buried out in the desert somewhere. Anyway, he breaks into Penelope’s house in the middle of night, questions her family and friends and then enjoys another few touch ups whilst the tale unfolds.

There is actually a good story behind the characters and I really did enjoy reading the book. It kept me interested and I did like all of the characters. If you want more of a sensible literary critique though, I suggest you go to to the TB girls or a grown up.

I do have a few general questions though.. What is this “I want to breed you” business, coupled with “milking things” I don’t know if we are having sex or taking an unhealthy interest in farmyard cattle. I am not sure I could say “Milk me baby” with a straight face. Also, when did C U Next Tuesday become a term of endearment for lady bits? Don’t get me wrong, I am more than happy for you ladies to call it this, but I am not sure that this is socially acceptable term to you.

But what do I know? I normally like to buy my lady dinner, wine and dine and listen to her conversation. Although I will try some new moves after reading this book. I will go up to a random girl and say ‘you are mine, I am going to breed you and I taste your C U Next Tuesday and I look forward to you milking me.’ If she plays coy, I will follow her around and turn up in random places saying that I own her. I will let you all know how it turns out and also any travel restrictions that get imposed on me under the sexual offenders order that follows.

I do like the idea of paying for something with my body though. Next time I’m grocery shopping, rather than pay cash, I will just whip my bits out onto the conveyor belt and say “we both know what is going happen here”.

I would definitely recommend this book and it is one that I will always remember, so thank you very much Alexa Riley. Keeping in line with the 80’s theme though, could you do a sexed up version of Caddyshack though? There are endless possibilities and innuendos with “playing through the back 9″, ” biting down on his wedge” and getting knee deep in her sand trap. You have complete artistic licence, as long as the gopher is there and he gets bred but not milked, I don’t really mind. Anyway I am off to listen to my best of the 80’s hits collection as I need to cut loose.

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