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TBB EXCERPT from A VERY BOSSY CHRISTMAS by KAYLEY LORING

And there she is. The woman who keeps my schedule running smoothly and handles me with the sleek, unruffled grace of a highly skilled assassin. She shields me from all of the assholes and idiots I don’t want to deal with. I like it. She’s the executive assistant of my dreams and the succubus from my filthiest, most confusing adolescent nightmares. She’s the woman who’s kept me in a constant state of blue balls for the past two months. Today, she’s torturing me with a tight black pencil skirt, knee-high boots, and a cashmere sweater that looks like it was spray-painted onto her evil curves. Her brown hair is so shiny; I believe her shampoo is made from the semen of demonic stallions. It’s up in a bun, revealing the satiny smooth skin of her long neck. I could spend an hour or twelve just kissing that neck, and I bet she’d like it too.

But that’s neither here nor there.

She’s standing by her desk with a coffee mug in one hand, her other hand resting just above her hip, right where I should be gripping her.

“Cooper.”

“Morning, Sunshine. You’ve got your conference call with Drucker in ten minutes, and Harvey from Cravath had to push your lunch to the new year because he’s an actual human who takes time off to be with his family during the holidays.”

“I’m not going to the office party next week.”

“I’m pretty sure you are. Let me just check your schedule. Hang on…” She mimes looking at a schedule on a monitor. “Yup. December 22nd, five to five thirty or later, office holiday party.”

She follows me into my office, shutting the glass door behind her. Those glass walls and doors were my least favorite thing about this office until two months ago.

“Get it off my schedule.”

“I know it may feel like I RSVP’d ‘yes’ in order to punish you, and I’m glad it feels like punishment, but the entire executive team will be in attendance. So I’m actually doing my job and helping you to look like slightly less of a terrible person.”

She places the coffee mug on my desk, on the coaster, leaning forward and exposing just enough bra and cleavage to make a grown man cry. She turns the mug around so the World’s Best Boss text is facing me and winks. I fucking love it when she winks at me. Even when she’s being a sassy little turd.

I take a seat and glower at her. “You’re telling me Shapiro is going to this thing?”

“Yes, the founder and CEO of this company will be attending the festivities along with most of the employees from all of the offices. Including his beloved General Counsel.”

Both hands rest on her hips now, and she sticks her chest out, defiant and hot. Hot and defiant and endlessly problematic. But really hot.

“That is very disappointing. Will you be there? If I have to go, then you do too.”

“Why yes. I and the rest of the executive assistants as well as the entire support staff will be there—thanks for asking!”

“Who’s going to answer the phones? Or are we all hoping to drop off the list of top ten New York real estate firms next year?”

“They’re bringing in temps to cover the phones that day.”

“Thought of everything, huh?”

“Yeah, and I hear they got the deluxe karaoke machine, so…” She smirks at me. That smirk does things to me. That smirk is highly problematic.

“Tell one of the interns to get my car washed.”

“Right away, sir.” She bats her eyelashes.

“But not the one who did it the last time—he’s a smoker. And not the girl who did it the time before that—my car was infused with her perfume for a week, and I did not like it.”

“I’ll be sure to request the one who always gets onion rings at White Castle on his way to the car wash.”

I raise the coffee mug to sniff it. “What is this?”

“A steaming hot cup of the tears of your former assistants.”

“That’s funny, because it smells like pumpkin spice.”

“That’s hilarious, because it’s a pumpkin spice latte.”

“That’s interesting because I only drink black coffee and espresso. You know that.”

“I thought maybe the pumpkin spice would put you in the holiday spirit.”

“Fuck holiday spirit. Fuck pumpkin spice.”

She crosses her arms in front of her ample, problematic chest. “Maybe you should. It would probably put you in a better mood…”

I narrow my eyes at her. “Are you trying to get yourself fired, Cooper?”

“Yes, but I’m not expecting a Christmas miracle.”

Our Review

‘I could lose myself in this woman, find myself again…But then what?’

As Declan’s wild Boston cousin Billy would say…this was a ‘wicked pissaah of a book!’ and we feel so happy after reading it. Talk about spreading not only the Christmas cheer but the swoony, sexy, smile-inducing, hilariously funny and all-round fabulous cheer as well. We cannot wipe the smiles off our faces. This book was THE PERFECT remedy for the shit show that is 2020! We couldn’t have found a better escape! An absolute reading delight and a top 2020 fave!

‘I punish her with my tongue.
I thank her with my fingers.
I worship her with my mouth.’

We’ve previously read and adored a couple of Kayley Loring’s books but in A Very Bossy Christmas, we fell completely and utterly in love with EVERY single word and EVERY single character. Wait until you meet cocky lawyer, Declan Cannavale. Ooooh boy, this grouchy workaholic with the dirty mouth and beautiful heart had us swooning so hard we nearly fell off our chairs. This guy was everything!

“You’ve got a big heart, Declan Cannavale. And I’m going to tell everyone.”
“Then I’m going to have to sue you for defamation of character.”

We cannot stress enough how much fun this book was to read! The way in which Kayley Loring executed this story was spot on. Heart-warming and perfectly spot on! This book all the ingredients to make our hearts laugh and sing – unbelievably sizzling chemistry, hilarious banter between ALL the characters! Declan Cannivale’s Irish/American/Italian family and Maddie Cooper’s Staten Island crew had us in stitches. We couldn’t get enough and can’t remember laughing this hard at certain scenes in quite a while.

‘She’s the executive assistant of my dreams and the succubus from my filthiest, most confusing adolescent nightmares.’

You know those books you finish and discuss with your book soulmate, every five seconds its– ‘omg remember this bit….Oh and ‘what about this bit’ and you spend your time completely smitten and falling in love all over again with everything you’ve read – you just want to talk about it again and again so all those happy feelings resurface. That’s what Kaley Loring did…she made us HAPPY!

‘Colin Firth can kiss my delicious American ass – I’m as romantic as fuck.’

A boss/employee romance, a fake relationship, Christmas chaos, hot heavy sex, emotional turmoil, family drama (albeit in a very amusing way), loveable characters and the funniest banter you’ll encounter, all added up to one of our favourite reads this year. Nothing beats a really good Christmas romance to get you in the Christmas spirit and Kalyey Loring certainly delivered an immensely enjoyable, steamy, romantic and bloody funny early Christmas pressie! Merry Christmas to us! Maddie, Declan and their clans are responsible for two very big goofy grins and giddy hearts!

“Are you okay? What’s happening to your face”
“It’s smiling, Coop”

On a side note: Fans of Emma Chase will love A Very Bossy Christmas! Declan has those same clueless yet vulnerable qualities we love in an Emma hero. Add this to your reading list! You’ll be glad you did!

Synopsis

What’s the actual last thing you’d ever want your executive assistant to see you doing the morning after you had hot, drunk, angry sex with her in a terrible hotel room? Dancing around your terrible hotel room to “Come and Get Your Love” like Star-Lord in Guardians of the Galaxy—naked? Yeah. Me too.

And yet, here we are.

This isn’t even the most unprofessional thing that’s happened between us in the past couple of weeks.

The first was when I agreed to let her have Christmas Day off, but only if she goes with me to three family gatherings as my fake girlfriend.
The second was when she caught me belting out a Christmas song on stage in the awful hotel bar.
The third was the hot, drunk, angry sex that followed, but I do not regret it.

And she hasn’t even found out the real reason I need her by my side this holiday season.

I need to pull it together before I do the dumbest, most unprofessional thing of all—fall head over heels in love with the only assistant who’s lasted more than a month at the job and claims to hate me and my moods more than she hates eggnog.

And I’ve seen how much she hates eggnog.

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